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atonement
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Atonement
Atonement
by Ian McEwan Pages 21 - 40

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(Brought to you by jat impatientreader.com) Briony's older sister, Cecilia, is walking away from the house, admiring the fountain in her yard and longing for a cigarette. She notices her childhood friend Robbie doing gardening work in the yard, but is reluctant to talk with him. She thinks about how ugly the house is to her, even though the view from it is quite nice.

She comes back to the house to pick up a vase to place the flowers in. She's bored at home, but doesn't know what to do with herself. She's anxious to go, yet reluctant at the same time. She takes some flowers and puts them into a vase that's been in her family for many years and is an antique from the 18th century. She wants to fill the vase in the kitchen, but the family is around and not in a good mood. She also doesn't want to go outside to fill the vase at the fountain, because her friend Robbie is there and she feels like she'll be forced to talk to him.

She goes outside anyway and goes to the fountain. Robbie is there and she asks him to roll her a cigarette. He starts to do that, and she makes small talk with him. She feels attracted to him somehow, but she doesn't want to admit it to herself. He gives her the cigarette and they talk about literature and authors. She mentions that her brother is coming to the house and bringing a friend. Robbie asks if she's giving him flowers, and she wonders if he's jealous of her brother's friend. They talk about Robbie's plans to become a doctor, and he says that he's going to pay her father back for it (evidently, Cecilia's father is subsidizing his education). She thinks about how he's been very distant and aloof lately.

Cecilia goes to fill the vase with water, irritated at Robbie for being so distant, at the same time knowing that there was a tension that had grown up between them. He tries to help her with the vase, but it only causes them to break the lip of the vase and drop it into the fountain. She almost feels pleasure at making him feel guilty for breaking the family heirloom.

He starts to take off his shirt to get into the fountain and retrieve the piece of the vase, but she intends to make him feel even more guilty, so she undresses and climbs into the fountain herself. She picks up the pieces and gets out of the fountain without his help, then gets dressed and goes back into the house.
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